Nice Try

Colby-man has a sensitivity to wheat and is on a gluten-free diet.  He knows this, and HATES this.  But, when he eats alot of wheat, it gets kinda ugly, so.... rice flour it is.  YUM.  Anyways, that's really hard for a little boy to do when he's surrounded by Christmas cookies, and wheat flour birthday cakes, so we allow him one "gluten" day a week - whatever day of his choice.  We were at several Christmas-themed events yesterday where cookies were abundantly available, so that was a no-brainer.  Saturday was "gluten day".

This morning, I found him eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on whole wheat bread.
Mom: "COLBY!  I thought yesterday  was 'gluten day'!  Why are you eating bread today?"

Deer in headlights stare.  Caught red-handed (well, brown-handed, as he's not so neat with peanut butter) .....

Colby: "Uhhhh, I'm not Colby.  HE IS!"  And then he pointed to his brother.  Who, by the way, was also eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Mom: "Nice try.  I gave birth to you.  You're not fooling me."

Colby: "I can try."

States of Matter

Quinn was staring intently at the lit advent wreath last night, and popped off with this question:
Quinn: "Is fire a liquid, a solid, or a gas?"
UHHHHHHHHHHH.  OK.  GOOD question. 
Mom: "I think it must be a gas.  Except, it consumes gas, so.... maybe not."
Rob: "It's an exothermic reaction releasing energy from a solid and converting it to a gas.  It's just a chemical reaction, it isn't matter."
Quinn: "But the flame ITSELF.  What is that??"
Rob: "Uhhhhhh"
So, we googled it (AFTER we finished our prayers for Advent, of course).

Do YOU know the answer?  Because I bet you were taught, like we were, that there are three states of matter. 

WRONG.  There's a fourth state.  PLASMA.

Fire is plasma.  Who knew?

Continue about your day now.

Breakfast Burps

The scene:  Reagan, Quinn, Colby and I sitting at the breakfast table this morning.

Colby: "BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPP."
Mom: ((scowl, while patiently waiting to see if good manners kick in))
Quinn: "Colby, what do you say?"
Reagan: "Excuse me!  You should say excuse me!"
Colby: "That one almost hit the ceiling."
Quinn: "No, Colby... what do you say?"
Reagan: "Excuse me! Right mom?  He should say excuse me!"
Colby: "That's a doozie!"
Quinn: "No, Colby.  What do you say?"
Reagan: "EXCUSE ME!  SAY EXCUSE ME!"
Colby: "Uhhhhhhhhhhhh....."
Quinn: "Colby, you're supposed to say 'that tasted alot better going down than it did coming up'."
Colby: "That tasted alot better going down than it did coming up".
Quinn: "Thank you."

Annnnnnddd... dash the mother's hopes.  I honestly thought there for a second that I witnessing a giant leap forward in the civility of my children.  So gullible. 

Oh MY!

Quinn came home with THIS answer on his Social Studies test today:

"Pubic property is something everyone can go on". 

((sigh))

Creative Genius

The video speaks for itself....

Wedgies

Mom: "Colby, get some clean underwear out of the laundry basket."
Colby: "I can only find Diego underwear in there!"
Mom: "So?  What does that matter??"
Colby: "I can't wear Diego underwear to school!"
Mom: "Why not?  No one sees your underwear."
Colby: "Yes they do!"
Mom: "Really?!?!"
Colby:  "TJ gives me wedgies.  And if he sees Diego underwear, when he gives me a wedgie, he'll laugh at me!"

Then by all means, prepare for the wedgie by wearing "cool" underwear, my son.  SO glad I'm not in the 3rd grade anymore!

Christopher Columbus Biography Report - by Quinn Aho