Dining with Celebrities

I never know who I'm going to get when I see my children. In the morning lately, I've woken up to two Spidermen in the room. Tonight at dinner - a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle and a Power Ranger. Not that either boy has seen either show, but we have the costumes, and so there they were at dinner. They were talking about which superhero foods would make them grow the tallest. And then Quinn got very worried, because when he grew that tall, his head would hit the ceiling, and the ceiling would break and make a mess, and then Mom would get MAD. Messes are currently my biggest pet peeve, because they are constant, fully preventable, and require much too much of my time. I told him that, if by chance he grew 10 feet tall by eating pepperoni pizza for dinner, and the ceiling subsequently collapsed, I would not get mad, as it would obviously be an accident.
"Oh, Mommy doesn't get mad if it's an ask-i-dent? Like when I spilled my milk?" Yes. Like that, superhero.

Then Colby went into a long history of how, because he was a turtle and all, he tried "swimming" on the kitchen floor, which made Quinn mad because there wasn't any WATER on the kitchen floor, so he took it upon himself to give Colby a spanking. "Black superhero hit the turtle, and the turtle cried." Yes, I had heard the entire exchange when it happend. But how do you mediate a fight about pretend turtles swimming in pretend water, being reprimanded by a pretend superhero? It seemed pointless to intervene, so I didn't, until the hitting occurred, at which point parental instinct took over.

Life's not so easy when the house is full of superheros.

Beavis and Butthead

Sometimes, having 4 year olds is like living with Beavis and Butthead. I was singing a blessing over them tonight, to the tune of Edelweiss. It's very pretty. This is how it went tonight....

Mom: "May the Lord, mighty God, bless and keep you forever
Grant you Peace...."

Quinn: "heh heh heh. You said 'pees' ".

Mom: "Grant you PEACE, perfect PEACE, courage in every endeavor."

UGH.

Pre-schooler-isms

These were two statements in a row this morning, by two different preschoolers. Anyone care to interpret?

Colby: "The toilet seat is crunchy"
Quinn: "My shoes want a strawberry bar".

WHAT??

Chore Chart, here we come!

When the boys got off the school bus yesterday, I put their (brand new, first time worn) gloves, hats and nametags in their backpacks, hung up their coats, and put their shoes under the bench. By the time I got home from observation at the hospital, one hat, one glove, one coat, and one entire pair of shoes was MISSING. And both boys were coatless and barefoot playing outdoors in 40 degree weather. UGH!!! This morning getting ready for school was a complete scramble, with Quinn wearing last-year's too small coat, and Colby wearing last-year's too-small shoes, adult-sized gloves, and a bright orange hat that matches NOTHING. All this after the tantrum this morning about not being able to find ONE PARTICULAR toy, that Quinn just HAS to play with, despite the mounds of other toys he owns. I think it's time to start a chore chart, and give some responsibility to little boys for keeping track of their own things! Mom is already overwhelmed with daily things while 8 1/2 months pregnant -- and four years old is old ENOUGH, I think....

Thanks

The boys, in a continuing trend to get up at o'dark thirty, walked into my bathroom just as I was toweling off (I've GOT to get a lock for that door). Unphased, Colby just looked at me in my underwear and said "That's a big one, mom". Uh-huh.

Bedtime Story

I love the age of four. We still have our "moments", but overall, the boys are sweet, wild, and good boys. They have been up since six a.m. without a nap, so I wanted to get them to bed ASAP after dinner and a shower. They, however, wanted a book read to them. We negotiated, and agreed that they would lie down quietly in the dark, and I would make up a bedtime story for them, for them to listen to. This was the story:

"Once upon a time, there were two little boys named Quinn and Colby. They wanted some applesauce, so they went into the woods to pick some apples. Suddenly, a big, mean bear jumped out in front of them and started growling. GRRRRR. He wanted to eat their apples. Morgan, the black dog, jumped in front of Quinn and Colby and started barking RUFFF RUFF RUFFF . The bear was so scared, he ran away. And Quinn and Colby brought mom their apples and they all made applesauce for dessert. THE END."

Not the most creative, exciting story in the world, but short (which was my only goal).

Colby's response?

"That's such a GOOD ONE, Mom." Thanks little man. They're so easy to please at this age:).

The age of Irrationality

So, I KNOW they were tired on Tuesday night, as we got home late from our church meeting. And I KNOW that they got up way way too early for the next school day. It's just funny to me how that translates into irrational thoughts.

When coming home on Tuesday night, Quinn started crying for a HALF HOUR because he wanted to live in a GRAY house and he was stuck with a BLUE house. I told him our house was gray, but he was NOT buying it. He brought it up again yesterday morning. Very disappointed that we lived in the house we did, because he thought, apparently, (because we had to detour due to a car wreck on the way home on Tuesday night) that we were going to a new house and that THIS TIME it would be gray instead of blue. Sorry. We're not moving every time we have to go home a different way.

Yesterday, then, since they went to bed at 10 pm and woke up at 6 am, I knew the boys would be tired, and picked them up from school rather than having them ride the bus. Colby was already almost comatose by 1 pm. I told the boys we were going to stop by Grandma and Grandpa's house to give them something, and then go home and nap. Quinn INSISTED on stopping by Aunt Diane and Uncle Tom's house first. In MINNESOTA. I told him it was far far away. He said he was in the mood for a long trip. I told him they weren't expecting us, and we didn't know if they were at home. He said "I know! We'll look in a telescope to see far away and find out if they're home!" Good plan, but I did not have a telescope. When we arrived at Grandma and Grandpa's, he cried and refused to get out of the car to say hi for the first 15 minutes or so, because his mean mom refused to take him to Minnesota to visit Aunt Diane and Uncle Tom. Luckily, Grandpa's offer of icecream coaxed him out of the car.

What Quinn learns at School

I was running late for a meeting at church, so I was RUSHED. I was nagging the little boys to move quickly, hurry up, get their shoes on, cram down dinner. Got them in the car, began driving a little too fast down the road. Colby began yelling "MOM! Stop stop stop!" when I was approaching the stop sign. I SAW the stop sign. I was going to stop, just not until I GOT there. Then Quinn says from the back seat...

"MOM! RELAX! Take...A.... Breath!" I burst out laughing. WHERE did he hear that? To my knowledge, I hadn't ever said such a thing to him before. I asked him how he had learned that technique.

"At school." he replied calmly. And it worked! I was laughing so hard, I slowed down, and better yet... calmed down. Now I'm just wondering what Quinn was doing that made his teacher tell him to "RELAX and Take...A.... Breath!".

AAAAHHH!

Colby's little guardian angel is working OVERTIME lately. I was getting the boys ready for school this morning, and ran out of the room for a SECOND to go get an envelope for their book order. Upon my return, I smelled smoke. Quinn told me that Colby had made fire! WHAT??????? And then I saw it.... the box of matches from the candle I had lit last night, sitting on the table, with four spent matches next to it, wafting smoke. AAAAHHHH! My gut reaction was FEAR that he could've burnt down the house and everyone in it. Instead of screaming, I used my new-found "good mommy techniques" I've been studying up on for our Mothers Of Preschoolers meeting tomorrow. I told him, with a VERY earnest voice, how that was VERY VERY VERY VERY dangerous, and he could've hurt himself and everyone else, and to NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER play with matches again. And to myself, I was thinking "NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER leave the matchbox out again!" I think he understood. He gave me a hug and seemed to feel pretty bad about the whole thing, and Quinn kept saying "It wasn't me! It was Colby! I didn't play with fire!" I think my fear registered all the way around. Rob came into the room, and I told him what had happened. He was impressed that Colby had figured out how to light a match off a box, admiring his problem-solving skills and fine-motor control. "He must've watched me light the sauna last night!"
See THIS is the difference between Moms and Dads!!!

For Grandma and Grandpa

Just for Grandma Betty and Grandpa Jim, who live so far, far away.... this is what the boys looked like talking to you tonight. Sitting in Great-Great Grandpa's rocking chair, each with their own phone, REFUSING to say goodbye.

A long drop

Well, it happened, less than a week after bunk beds. 4:30 am this morning. I was in my bedroom, far far away from little boys' room. I heard a THUNK, and knew instantly what had happened. Running as fast as my pregnant body would let me in pitch darkness, I made it upstairs. There was Quinn, whimpering at having been awokened, but still on top of his bed. Where was Colby? I had put him to bed in his lower bunk, but he wasn't there. I checked the floor as best I could in the dark. No Colby. Then, I heard soft crying on top of the boys' stool. He had fallen off the top bunk, and landed on his belly, still asleep, on a 18" square padded stool which had been haphazardly placed in the EXACT place it needed to be to break his fall. Who says there's not Guardian Angels???

Up before the Sun

The boys have been so excited for school that they wake up LOOOONNNGGG before dawn these days. Today - 6:45 am. They came shuffling downstairs, where I was just getting out of the shower. I asked them why they were up so early! It was still "night time!" Quinn put his head in his hands and said "Yes, I see the moon and the stars. Stars are so cool!" And started singing "twinkle twinkle little star" , which he informed me was ALSO a cool song. It was too cute to be irritated at their early rising.

Snoozing through the lecture

While taking a shower tonight, I discovered the boys had emptied the ENTIRE bottle of shampoo, in order to "get the bubbles out". I made a "GRRRRR" sound upon this discovery. "What's wrong mom?" they asked. I told them they had just wasted the shampoo, and I was not happy.
C: "Oh, sorry mom."
Q: "We'll go to the store and get more"
M: "Yes, but that costs money."
C: "Sorry mom."
Q: "What's money?"
M: "Something we don't have alot of to be wasting on bottles of shampoo." As I launched into a full discussion about earning money by working and the importance of spending money wisely, my son Quinn closed his eyes and started to pretend-snore. WHERE did he learn THAT? Come on, boy. The lectures are only BEGINNING in your life. They will get longer and more boring as you get older, I guarantee it.

It begins....

A first yesterday. As regular readers of my blog know, my children have NO QUALMS at all about nakedness, or any state of undress. In any setting. Yesterday, when getting ready for school, Colby took all his clothes into the bathroom to dress. I followed him in, and said "do you need any help?" He said no, picked up his clothes and walked into the CLOSET. OOOOOOHHHH. He wanted PRIVACY! I left the bathroom, and he promptly shut the door behind me. He's been closing the door when going to the bathroom, too - especially when I am around. This is a good sign, as modesty is a sign of maturity, I suppose - but.... I'm his MOMMY!!!!

The family Dog

Both boys were FINALLY in a good mood yesterday, after a week and a half of "horrendous". I'm blaming it on starting school, which means new schedule, increased behavioral demands, few naps, and the onset of colds. It was getting ugly there for awhile. Yesterday, I had my little boys back (at least for the time being). I was thrilled! I could tell by the smiles as soon as they woke up.
I greeted them at the door, rubbed their heads, and said
"Good morning, little boys! How are you today!"

Quinn just looked at me and said "Why are you treating me like a dog?" I didn't follow. A dog?
"Yes! You're patting my head!"

Oh. Sorry. It's just a natural instinct. "Good boy. Good boy."