Quotes from a Passel of 11 Year Olds at a Birthday Party

Boys are so.... boys.  They make me laugh and cringe and laugh some more.    I tried to be unobtrusive at the party (well, until after midnight, and then I got CRABBY), and put on my listening ears to catch this:

(during a squirt-gun fight)  "I'm not on a team.  I am a mercenary.  Make me an offer.  No - higher."

"I can't have cake.  I can't have pop.  I can't eat pepperoni. I can't eat chocolate.  I can't eat peanuts."   Apparently, only the watermelon was universally acceptable on the menu. 

"I have a very good sense of taste, and I can tell that your drinking water has moved through plastic pipes before coming in to my cup.  I need different water."

(upon this mama coming upon a miscellaneous 11 year old that she didn't own, stealing her chair when she got up for a second)  Me:  "Hey!  That's my chair!"   Child: "Nope.  Not any more.  It's mine. Find your own."

(upon this mama coming upon another miscellaneous 11 year old shaking the pop and having it explode on her daughter's head)  Me: "HEY!  That's not a good idea!"  Child: "No!  It's okay!"  (????)

Me: "(miscellaneous child that I don't own)!!  Do not play in the woods by yourself at 11 o'clock at night looking for fireflies!!  Did you not JUST hear that coyote right there?"

Colby: "Mom!  I broke my toe!"  Me:  "OK.  We'll look at it after the party.  Carry on."

Me: "Boys!  It is nearly one o clock in the morning.  You MUST got to sleep.  I have to get up in 6 hours to go to work.  The birthday is OVER.  It is officially July 10th.  If I hear one more footstep on the floor, that person will be sleeping with ME upstairs.  DO YOU UNDERSTAND?????"  Miscellaneous boy that I don't own: "WOW!  You're crabby!". 

HOW CAN THIS BE?????

In honor of our birthdays today, we got out the ol' baby books to find out what Quinn, Colby, and Mommy were up to this very day, 11 years ago.  I teared up, which surprised no one, reading the letter from the NICU doctor telling me not to worry, she was going to take good care of my little ones.  (sniff sniff).  And THEN, seeing the imprint of these teeny tiny little feet, and realizing that the boys are so big, baby feet then are the same size as their THUMB now. 

Time is going so so so so so so fast.